Soak the Fruit (Weeks or Months Ahead):
Combine all dried fruits in a large glass jar or container with a tight-fitting lid.
Pour rum, port, cherry brandy, vanilla, almond extract, and lime zest over the fruit and stir to combine.
Seal tightly and store in a cool, dark place for at least 2 weeks, preferably 1-3 months. Stir or shake every few days. The fruit should absorb most of the liquid and become plump and deeply flavored.
Shortcut (minimum 24 hours): Combine fruit and liquors in a saucepan, warm gently over low heat for 10 minutes, then cool and refrigerate overnight. The flavor won't be as developed, but the cake will still be delicious.

Make the Browning:
Place sugar in a heavy-bottomed saucepan. Cook over medium heat, stirring constantly with a wooden spoon, until sugar melts, then turns from golden to very dark brown—almost black—and begins to smoke slightly, 8-10 minutes. The sugar must be genuinely burnt (but not acrid) for authentic flavor and color.
Carefully and very slowly add the first ¼ cup water to the pan—it will sputter violently. Stand back.
Add boiling water and stir until the burnt sugar dissolves into a thick, dark syrup. Cool completely. Store in a jar at room temperature indefinitely.

Prepare the Fruit Paste:
Drain soaked fruit, reserving any remaining liquid.
Process fruit in a food processor until it forms a thick, chunky paste—not completely smooth. Some texture is desirable. Add 2-3 tablespoons reserved soaking liquid if needed to help blend.

Make the Cake:
Preheat oven to 300°F (150°C). Grease a 9-inch round cake pan (at least 3 inches deep) and line with parchment paper on bottom and sides.
In a stand mixer with paddle attachment, cream butter and brown sugar until very light and fluffy, 5-6 minutes.
Beat in browning and molasses until combined.
Add eggs one at a time, beating well after each addition. Scrape down bowl between additions. Mixture may look slightly curdled—this is fine.
In a separate bowl, whisk together flour, baking powder, cinnamon, allspice, nutmeg, ginger, cloves, and salt.
Add flour mixture to butter mixture in three additions, mixing on low just until combined after each.
Fold in the fruit paste thoroughly—the batter will be very thick and dark.
Scrape batter into prepared pan, smoothing the top. Tap pan firmly on counter to remove air bubbles.

Bake:
Bake 2-2½ hours until a skewer inserted in the center comes out clean and the cake feels firm when gently pressed. The long, low bake develops flavor and prevents the outside from burning while the dense interior cooks through.
Every 20-30 minutes, check the top. If browning too quickly, tent loosely with foil.
Cool in pan 30 minutes, then turn out onto a wire rack.

Feed the Cake:
While cake is still warm, poke holes all over the top and bottom with a skewer.
Brush generously with rum, allowing it to soak in. Wrap tightly in cheesecloth, then plastic wrap.
Store in an airtight container. Feed with additional rum every few days for up to 1 month. The cake improves dramatically with time.
Minimum: Let cake rest, wrapped, at least 2-3 days before serving.

Prepare the Strawberries:
Reserve a few beautiful strawberries for garnish. Quarter the remainder.
Toss quartered strawberries with sugar, lemon juice, and rum if using. Macerate at room temperature 30 minutes to 1 hour.

Make the Cream:
Beat cold cream, powdered sugar, vanilla extract, and vanilla bean seeds (if using) until soft, billowy peaks form. Do not overbeat—cream should be luxuriously soft, not stiff.

To Serve:
Place cake on a serving plate and dust lightly with powdered sugar if desired.
Pile whipped cream generously on top, allowing it to cascade naturally.
Spoon macerated strawberries and their juices over and around the cream.
Garnish with halved fresh strawberries and mint leaves.
Slice with a sharp knife dipped in hot water for clean cuts.